you.me.and a thousand different ways.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

today was a real frustrating day.

because.. well, the admin staff in the school really did screw things up! i found out today, i'm not supposed to be taking a module that i've been taking on saturday! and what made me even more frustrated was that you know, i've made arrangements at the clinic, told sharmaine about it, and she has made amendments.. and then, look at what happened!

i was so angry.. really boiling at that point. i came home from my piano lesson and i was screaming my heart out. even my dad got angry.

but then i realized that it was all god's work. i had prayed for no lessons, for free time on Saturdays and Sundays, so that i have the time to rest. and he answered my prayer. just that it had gone a long long way. after all the hassle that i went through, he still answered my prayer, and now, things work out. i'm still gonna be working, the money is still going to come in, and i can still commit myself to whatever that i promised God in the first place.

so when i thought things through, i wasn't that mad anymore. because i realized it was all in his plan. though i would have to end up travelling to and fro more often (working in the clinic in 2 days instead of 1 full day), not getting a raise even though i'm working on sunday (it's alright lahh), and i have saturday afternoons off. i know i can leave promptly at 1pm, and probably i can try to have lunch out now. maybe i can find the time to go over to visit my niece more often. maybe i have the luxury of spending a weekend (sat night) at my grandma's as well. and i can now try to have time to catch up and spend more time with my friends.

so it works out both ways. so it's all in God's plans after all.

yet, i found out today, that i still need to be studying for 1 semester more. there's no way i can be taking the 4 modules, and i can forget about studying during the summer semester as well. maybe this is in god's plan as well, since i made up my mind to try to pay for a bit of my studying now.

and i guess it isn't a bad thing to be studying for 2 1/2 years. given the timetable now, i don't even feel like a full-time student.

on a different note..
my piano exam is on saturday! and today was my final lesson.. think mrs tan's feeling that i will be able to do it. but i'm not sure. i know how i'd freak out. but leaving everything to God. i don't want to be too confident. i know what happened the last time round. and to know that when i gotten the results then.. the person that i cared about the most just didn't give two hoots about the results, and people like angie & marcus were by my side, comforting me as the tears rolled down my eyes.

don't want to cry over results now. i want to have faith that i can do it.

22:41 | com[ments] |